I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
