took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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