you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
