Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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