found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
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