I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
