Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
