get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
