They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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