Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
