i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Randomize