I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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