so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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