just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
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