Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
