people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Randomize