im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
