I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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