You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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