I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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