We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
