She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
he fucked my hip out of place.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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