He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
