If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
