I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
