So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Terrible idea I love it
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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