ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
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