He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Randomize
