3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
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