I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
