is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Randomize
