I hate all girls vehemently.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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