exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
