woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
