So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
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