Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
