Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
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