So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I have fence marks all over my body
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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