just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Randomize
