Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
