i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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