Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
They are going to name an STD after you.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize