do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Randomize
