Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
