Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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