I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
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