I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
bring money and cleavage
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
