We won't sleep together?
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
