No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
