so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Randomize
