I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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