Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
